WHEREAS, the 73rd annual meeting of the American Society of Mammalogists was held at Western Washington University, Bellingham, Washington, 19-23 June 1993; and
WHEREAS, we were awakened each morning by the soothing siren call of the olive-sided fly catcher calling "quick-- free beers! quick-free beers! quick-free beers!," which Mac, eternal Chairman of the Ad Hoc Beverage Committee, believes may be one reason donations to the Beverage Fund have been minimal; and
WHEREAS, the daily hike to sessions gave the impression that the 73rd annual meeting was spread over two states and two nations, with registration in Oregon, the vendors, posters, and paper sessions in Washington, and the Plenary Session and Business Meetings on Vancouver Island; and
WHEREAS, we all wonder what "PYSCOLOGY" (presumably pronounced "piss-cology") is and what anatomical modifications are required to make it "of the mind"; and
WHEREAS, the modified darkrooms that are currently being used as dorm rooms were very comfortable; and
WHEREAS, although three keys were issued to reach your dorm room, the fourth key attempted was always the one that opened the door; and
WHEREAS, in spite of the many keys, the diligent efforts of campus security successfully limited dispersal of mammalogists between dorms, the slide preview room, and committee meeting sites; and
WHEREAS, the Local Committee (LC) of Western Washington University (WWU), used the latest technology, including GIS, PCR, ANCOVA, EcoRI, RFLP, CD-Rom, RAPD, the branch and bound option of PAUP, CITES, LORAN C, and CAPTURE to determine that all officers of the Society were infected with disease and parasites and shrewdly labeled them as "HOST" so that other members of the Society might be properly warned and not get infected during social interactions; and
WHEREAS, the Society has determined a successful way to get Jim Patton to attend successive meetings-elect him President; and
WHEREAS, rumor has it that Jim Patton told Guy Musser that "plenary" was Latin for "more than 100 minutes"; and
WHEREAS, we recognize the philanthropic nature of our two preceding Presidents (Elmer Birney, who donated his plane ticket and coat to the homeless in Seattle, and Jim Brown, who left his wallet to the Future Mammalogists Fund). These unselfish gestures resulted in several anonymous requests for Jim Patton and future presidents to raise the limits on their credit cards; and
WHEREAS, we never expected to encounter both the Rose Garden and Red Square in such close proximity; however, there have been numerous sightings of Bill and Hillary and Boris, especially after the evening of no-host socials; and
WHEREAS, the campus was filled with creative works of art, which outnumbered telephones 23 to one. Unfortunately, mammalogists required a field guide to distinguish art from bike racks, plumbing, dumpsters, and chain-link fences (that cougar sure looks like a bear), and we wonder if a mammalogist was not the creator of the pit-fall and dead-fall traps; and
WHEREAS, we have never seen a campus so committed to physical fitness, cycling, and recycling; and
WHEREAS, we loved the sunset over the bay, the Rose Garden, the lush green forest, the trails on Sehome Hill, and the picnic, volleyball, and Bald Eagles at Hovander Homestead Park; and
WHEREAS, the climate was wonderful, and we were impressed with the power of the Local Committee to so perfectly control the weather for the picnic; and
WHEREAS, Chris Maguire and the Local Committee provided a wonderful meeting, including exceptional esthetics, bountiful congeniality, excellent meeting rooms, signs that even a mammalogist can follow, and food and spirits unlimited in quality and quantity;
THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED, that The American Society of Mammalogists expresses heartfelt thanks to Western Washington University, the Local Committee, and especially our colleague Chris Maguire for a truly memorable meeting.